Tuesday 19 June 2012

100 Word Challenge - Duplicitous Recess

Fresh morning light flooded through the kitchen window invading shadows and mocking the stack of grease laden plates by the sink.

I sat at the breakfast bar hunched over a bowl of muesli. I managed one dry flaky mouthful before returning to the shocking news in yesterday's fingered paper.

David had committed suicide.

In the dark recess of my mind David's empty eyes met mine. Back then I'd felt equally compelled and repulsed by our attraction.

Charlotte entered. I felt uneasy.

"Coffee Char?"

"Yup. I'm gonna call David's brother."

"We're still going to the funeral then?"

"It's my fault. I have to go."

"Charlotte!" I was frustrated. "How is that duplicitous idiot's death your fault?"


I'm linking up with JB47's 100 Word Challenge. This week's prompt was ... in the dark recess of my mind ...




27 comments:

  1. This is familiar. Is it a continuation or reworking of writing you've done before? I seem to remember someone blaming themselves for someone's death. What a heavy burden to carry even though of course it's not her fault.

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    1. Yes ... its the continuation of the story. She is very guilt ridden - why could this be?

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    2. Because she loves someone to the extent that they are (or were) able to manipulate her into feeling guilty for things that were just not her responsibility? I once had a boyfriend who would behave badly with other women and then lecture me about how unattractive it was to be jealous. And I found myself agreeing with him that I should try to work on my jealousy. Luckily I grew up during that relationship and came to my senses.

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    3. Yes, I've had experiences like this too. Then one day my head switched itself back on again and I was out of the door! Yes, I think my character has definitely had the wool pulled over her eyes ...

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  2. Loved the opening line. Intrigued by the fact the attraction repulsed her as well as compelled her too. Looking forward to the story unraveling further.

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    1. Thank you. This was quite tricky to write as I was returning to the story before I wrote the pieces about David's death.

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  3. This has so much in it and I want to know more of before and definitely what was meant. So intriguing.Will wait for the next instalment with anticipation!

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    1. Ah thank you .... this story will tire itself out at some point!

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  4. ooohh love to know why he did this and how you linked it to an older post- its like a continuing story! :) the beginning statement drew me in so much i felt like i was there! x

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    1. Thank you! Yes, its a continuation of a tale thats been meandering on for a few weeks.

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  5. Clever how this is linked to a previous piece. Really intrigued by her being attracted and repulsed. Great piece.

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    1. Thank you Anna! All will be explained sooner rather than later.

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  6. I enjoyed that piece of writing and wanted to read on! Great work.

    CJ x

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    1. Thankyou CJ, and for popping by and commenting.

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  7. Interesting that both sisters seem to have some link to him. Look forward to the next installment.

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    1. Thank you. Interesting that you think they are both sisters ... they are actually flat mates and friends.

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    2. I've had them in my head as sisters from the start. May have to go back and reread the earlier ones with new knowledge now!

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    3. I actually don't think I have been overly clear as to their relationship. But its very interesting you think they are sisters ... there is something quite sisterly in their interactions.

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  8. Sad and creepy and intriguing, all rolled into one. Great job.

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    1. Thank you. Its a continuation of a story I've been writing for the last few weeks.

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    2. I agree with Lisa. I think I only remember one other installment of this, from a long time ago, so that might be why I don't have an understanding of the characters. Here, I'm very curious about David having been a "duplicitous idiot" and Charlotte's notion of being at "fault" in his suicide. Very interesting.

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    3. Thank you. Yes, its a continuation of a story that's been rumbling on for a few weeks now. I'm hoping to answer all the questions over the coming weeks and draw this tale to a close.

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  9. Intriguing tale--nice.

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  10. Looking forward to the next installment, I'm impatient now to find out what's happening! I imagine the funeral is going to be eventful. Great story, love how it's developing. Polly x

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    1. Thank you. I don't intend to stretch it out too long other wise the crux of the story might get lost. Yes, the funeral will be eventful!

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  11. I want to know more, your character intrigues me with her bold final statement!

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    1. I'm hoping to reveal all over the coming weeks .... all depends on those pesky prompts!

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