Tuesday 4 June 2013

#One Week - Spring '13 - Red Cheeks

There's a little girl swinging next to Little A. They've been playing together for the last half hour.

She looks at me, backwards and forwards, wide-eyed and curious. Then she turns to her daddy...

"She's got red things on her cheeks."  

Daddy shuffles, he's on the spot, a silent smile appeasing his daughter's enquiring mind.

He doesn't answer. We both know what she's talking about.

It cannot, must not be mentioned.

I wonder if he will explain when I'm not within earshot. I think I would.



I have Little A in a hip hold in my arms. She's observing me intently.

"Your cheeks are always red," she says.

And this spring it's bothered me.

The comments. The earnest observations.

I touch both cheeks and feel tiny raised bumps. I think of those tidal worm hills on waterlogged sand. I wish I could crush mine with a foot.

I can still see the ruddy patches in the dim yellow glow of the bedside light, and I frown at my reflection in the opposite mirror.



I have an archipelago of red islands on the east and the west hemispheres of my face.

Two constellations of deep pink stars.

Spotified.

Some are paired like ball room dancers, waltzing over my pores.

What caused it? Was it the end of breastfeeding? The Bobby Brown foundation? The Ponds cleanser? A limited diet? Lack of air and exercise? Not enough water? Am I over cleansing? Under cleansing?

I just don't know.

And they won't go away. They are melded into the landscape.


Maybe it's middle age leaking out. I have noticed hot flushes, they arrive with the morning post. And the hormones, the pendulum swing of my moods.

Or maybe it's anger painting itself?

Could someone give me an answer?

I thought life began at forty.

Instead, I am reliving my teenage years.


This is the third day of the seasonal linky One Week. Over the next few days (until Friday) I'll be posting a photograph(s) and a few words that diarises and distills my experience of spring '13. Take a peep at the details here. You can join in for one, two ... or the full five days. And don't forget to add #oneweek on Twitter, and comment on each others posts...


Badge Code ...

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36 comments:

  1. Aw - I really enjoy reading your One Week linky - it's amazing how much children notice...and are not afraid to talk about it out loud! x

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    1. Thank you. Children are disarmingly honest! X.

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  2. Oh I can sympathise with this - its only in the last year or 2 that I've managed to rid myself of the spots. I am 37 and I began to think they were never going to go away. Its not only your appearance but your mood and confidence too - I well know. Could it be hormone or even stress related? I hope you get to the bottom of it and I hope it clears and is forgotten. And yes - kids can be amazing in their honesty and clarity - and cruel too xx

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    1. I think it's a combination of stress and hormones. I have noticed that my skin has got better since I moved and now that I am out and about in the garden and exercising again. I love kid's honesty - just not about my face :o) X.

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  3. Lovely petals and writing again. Probably hormonal - lots of water should help. xxx

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    1. I reckon it's hormomal too! Taking your advice with ghusto! X.

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  4. I get them on my chin, never used to - think it's hormones or too much chocolate (in my case!) Lovely post, do so enjoy your One Weeks.
    Would it be ok if I linked up my day out at the seaside? x

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    1. I think you are right about the hormones! Of course you can link up that post X.

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  5. You won't believe my boy was just mentioning the spots I currently have on my cheeks today and quite loudly at that :) He also has a thing about my wrinkles and likes to tell me my legs "feel very rough mummy" when I haven't shaved which is quite often these days. I'm really enjoying #oneweek xx

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    1. Glad you are enjoying #oneweek! That made me smile :o) Mine also get worse at that time of the month which just happens to be this week.

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  6. Noting like children to highlight the that adults shy away from. Sounds like she has a great perspective - worthy of comment, but in no way negative. Suddenly with age can't follow my habitual routine of total neglect and now view my LIz Earle cleanser as a necessity not a luxury if I am to face the day.
    I love the way you illustrated this.

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    1. Thank you very much - children are very honest, but of course spots aren't a problem to them, it's us - the adults - who have turned it into an issue. Glad you like the way this was illustrated - the subject matter and the petals seemed to work well.

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  7. Oh Sarah my face has so many broken veins now that it looks like somebody has drawn the underground Central Line all over it! I'm going through a mirror avoidance phase x

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    1. I tend not to look in the mirror that much too! Broken veins? Is that because of the wind and rain and the great outdoors - sounds to me like you are very healthy and 'weathered'. X.

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  8. I know the pain of this too. I long for me teenage years when I really did have the clearest of skin. I drink water by the bucket and have a mostly great diet but no, the spots still appear, extremely unwelcome.

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    1. I am starting to think it's hormones and stress and ageing - bah! I always thought my skin would be lovely and clear in my middling years!

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  9. But you write about your blemishes so beautifully, they sound awesome! It might be that dreaded mid-life rush. I have the odd 'moment' now and again too. How the hell did we get from there, to here, this quickly eh?!

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    1. Thank you - maybe I should start saying that to myself - my blemishes are awesome! I think it is that dreaded mid-life rush! And you are so right - it's gone so quickly...

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  10. It could be rosacea, which I've had all my life. You wouldn't notice it on me - but that's because I've had it so long that it has forced me to change some things.
    I've written about it on my blog a bit, but my top tips would be ....

    1) Use paraben free face wash, and moisturiser with a flannel so that you are lightly scrubbing the dead cells off every day. The cheapest I found was in Superdrug, but wasn't good on an older skin. The one I'm currently using is the pomegranate range in Body Shop. The best was REN which you can get in Marks and Spencers and Space NK.

    2) Use a pareben free tinted moisturiser every day - I use body shop which isn't totally chemical free, the best I used was arbourne, but with a husband on his third redundancy it's not an ideal option now.

    3) Or benefit does a yellow concealer which is great - I don't need to use it any more.

    4) You must use a moisturiser or sun tan lotion every day with protection from wind and sun - although the sun should help to clear it up a little if you don't over do it.

    5) Anything that is an irritant or harsh on the body had to go - sugar (See my post for healthy alternatives), regular alcohol, curries, sweeteners

    6) and yes oldersinglemum is right - lots of water and healing/relaxation/meditation to look at any anger that might need to come out.

    Remember you are still beautiful xx

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    1. WOW. Just WOW. I was really taken aback by your really thoughtful comment. Really great suggestions - thank you so much. I've heard that using paraben free facial products is the way to go. I am currently using the Dermalogica range and I have to say it is very soothing on my skin, but I guess their products have parabens in too.

      Sugars and sweeteners - I hear you - I used to eat a lot less sugar and my skin was a lot better for it - it was clear!

      And of course - water, as nature intended! And relaxation too. I think my current skin problems have been a lot to do with flux in hormones and stress - I have had a lot if stress over the last year.

      I will remember to repeat that mantra, I am still beautiful.

      Thank you very much. XXX

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  11. My go-to product for all skin issues is virgin coconut oil (following a recommendation from Lucy at Lulastic). It seems counterintuitive, putting oil on, because you'd think it'd make you worse, but it's the most magic stuff I've ever found. So far, between the three people in our family, it has worked on dry skin, rosacea, stretch marks, spotty skin, sunburn, and fungal nail infection. You can either apply topically or cook with it.

    Other option if it's a hormonal thing may be acupuncture, which works for me every time my body is going a little haywire.

    When I saw you last week, my only thought was how lovely and radiant you looked, didn't notice at all xxx

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    1. Thank you so much for this suggestion. I've added it to my shopping list! Sounds like it will be just the ticket for my troublesome skin - I reckon what I have developed is acne/rosacea, and I think its due to hormones. I am currently using the Dermalogica products on my skin, and they are very good - I had a skin analysis don, and they did think it was hormones. It actually got worse after I finished breast feeding.

      Acupuncture is also a good idea too.

      Thank you lovely. And I thought what lovely young, clear skin you have. It was lovely meeting up. X

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  12. Beautiful photos! Children really are so innocent aren't they, unaware of what grown up life can be like and what makes us worry and self conscious. Sounds hormonal, I have noticed a big change in my skin recently and it does upset me sometimes I'm putting it down to hormones from birth control though. Problem is: Clear skin equals more babies! Dodgey skin equals no more babies! Not a hard choice right now! Have you been to a derm? x

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    1. Thank you very much! I love that about children's innocence. And I really do think it is hormonal - there is such a big shift after having a baby and then again after finishing breast feeding. Maybe I should have another to clear my skin up - ha ha ha. X

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  13. What an amazing post, filled with emotion, and beautiful photos. Wonderfully written. POD is just at that age where she's observing her surroundings. It's difficult that children can upset us through their innocence. My skin has changed too since I had POD, I wonder if it's hormonal?

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    1. Thank you very, very much. And so very true, how children can upset us through their innocence. Pardon the pun but there observations are spot on - it's us, me, that creates the problem around our complexions. I think it is hormonal.

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  14. No answers for you I'm afraid but beautiful writing as ever. Mich x

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    1. That's okay :o). Thank you very much. X.

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  15. That's kids. Big man was a little too curious over a mans tattoos the other day x

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  16. We all got spots and blotches. There's nothing to be done about an enquiring mind, but the adults could be more tactful. Hope it settles down soon x.

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    1. Me too - hope they settle down soon! Didn't expect spots in my forties. X.

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  17. It is so hard to find out exactly what causes skin breakouts. I hope you find the answer soon! xx
    PS: sorry I have not joined in this week, huge backlog after coming back from my London trip...

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    1. Tell me about it! X. Don't worry if you didn't get to join in - I totally understand :o).

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  18. Echoing the other comments, fabulously written. Children are so honest - aren't they? I'm just waiting for mine to start the 'why are your teeth yellow/ is your hair grey' questions - just as I'm sure I did to my Mum.

    I wish I had the answer to your skincare issues, but I'm no expert. I agree with all the comments but would also add - don't go too heavy on the sunblock - sometimes moderate sun exposure can be great for the skin (lots of vit D for a start!) sunblock might just clog things up further. There are some acupuncturists that specialise in acupuncture facials, maybe worth a try.

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    1. Thank you very much. They are too honest sometimes. She is also already asking me why my teeth are yellow - I think that's worse than the spots!

      And regarding you suggestions - those are very good indeed. The skin does need some sun! Being out in the garden recently has helped. And acupuncture would probably help too.

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