Monday, 30 April 2012

100 Word Challenge - Ruby Tears

I don't remember collapsing onto the beaten sofa.

I can only recall a cushion brushing against my arm as Charlotte's news registered.

David ... Dead? What? How?

I sat motionless. I saw his face. That crooked smile. That hollow gaze.

I fidgeted. I got up. I closed the curtains again. I sat back down.

I waited.

Charlotte appeared. Her eyes puffed. Cheeks crimson.

She crashed next to me.

The red lamp shade cast a ruddy shadow over her face. Ruby tears rolled down her cheeks.

Charlotte slowly turned to face me.

"Chrissy?" She croaked.

"Yeah?"

"It might be my fault."


I'm linking up with JB47's 100 Word Challenge. This week's prompt was ... Ruby

36 comments:

  1. Oh how terrible. I bet it wasn't her fault, though it'll take a lot of therapy to convince her.

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    1. Now you have given me another angle for the story! :o).

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    1. This one could run and run .....

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  3. Hard hitting piece; well done for getting that in so few words. Well written piece.

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    1. Thank you. It took a few re-edits.

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  4. Great piece, just a beginning, I hope??

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    1. Yes ... its amazing the world your head creates once you start writing.

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  5. Loads of potential ways forward with this!

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    1. Yes I think so ... I'm enjoying writing it.

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  6. Ooh...I want to know what happened! Who was David? How/why did he die?

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    1. I'm trying to figure it out .... what kind of person was he? This story might have legs!

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  7. Such a great lead in. Look forward to some more.

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    1. Thank you. I am sure there will be!

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  8. Great continuation of the last piece, and i love the way you fitted the prompt word in.

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    1. Thank you. Depending on next weeks prompt, there are a few directions I could take this.

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  9. What a fantastic piece. But please I need more... x

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    1. Thank you ... more coming ...

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  10. Excellent. I like the way you continued with the same storyline as last week's challenge. I'll watch with interest to see what next weeks prompt word is!

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    1. Thank you. This was either very cunning or very silly .... lets see what next weeks offering is!

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  11. Excellent writing, I especially like the way the last line leaves us hanging

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    1. Thank you .... not sure where to take it from here though.

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  12. I love the ruby tears and the cliffhanger. And the rest of the story. ~Miriam

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    1. Thank you. Lets see what happens next.

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  13. Great red imagery, especially those ruby tears! I love seeing all of the different takes that these prompts generate.

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    1. Thank you. I do too. There are some great interpretations.

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  14. DancingInTheRain5 May 2012 18:51

    Excellent writing. And I'm intrigued by how she apparently remembers him when hearing the news - crooked smile, hollow gaze. The two don't usually go together. Why was his gaze hollow? Was this why he died?

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    1. Thank you. I am not sure yet. So far I think he's a charming f**k up ... kind of making it up as I go along.

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  15. Wow, really like the shock and restlessness here...followed, of course, by the announcement of guilt at the end. You could definitely take this further.

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    1. Thank you ... Yes, I'm intending to ... it all depends on the prompts which way I take this.

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    2. Ah, so a mystery even to you...nice!

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  16. I'm SO enjoying reading these! Polly

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