Tuesday 18 September 2012

100 Word Challenge - Tempted Too Far

David was greedy for opportunity, he couldn't resist the insider deals.

This time he'd been tempted too far, and failed, had screwed the timings ...

Eden within his grasp. Then snared by the snake.

As the apple fell, the phone rang ...

"You messed up David. That wasn't on the cards." The Woman fell silent.

"Listen, I can make this right. There's another trade ..."

"Enough." The Woman interrupted. "You blew it. There's no going back. You know what happens next."

The phone cut dead.

David's mouth felt drier than The Client's account.

They were coming for him. But he wasn't giving in.

He held the final plan.


I'm linking up with JB47's 100 Word Challenge. This week's prompt was ... as the apple fell ...

This is part of a wider story. You can read the other instalments in the series here.



28 comments:

  1. Now I want to know what the final plan is. Love this.

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  2. OOOhhh...exciting. I'd like him to have embezzled all the money for starters. Sorry, probably most wrong to suggest to an author what one wants to happen! x

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    1. No, not at all - that's what writing groups are all about - anyway, good idea - I hadn't thought of that angle! :o).X.

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  3. I can hear the sinister "da da da dummmmm..." playing for the next series of scenes. :) great story!

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  4. ooh interesting. What's the final plan? Love it x

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  5. I've just read from the beginning again and its really good. I hope that when its finished you join it up and submit it somewhere?

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    1. Thank you for your lovely vote of confidence and taking your time to re-read it again - I'm glad you like it. I'm kinda winging it which isn't the best way to write a story. Maybe I could develop it further and then submit it?

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  6. Missed so many weeks I've just had to go back and read the story so far. I'm intrigued - looking forward to finding out what the final plan is.

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    1. Thank you for re-reading the catch up. The final plan - I'm working on it :o).

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  7. Someone's about to dig themselves deeper... Nice one.

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  8. Very pertinent given the case of the rogue trader on trial this week! Liked the way you wove the apple in..

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  9. wonderful! Definitely caught my attention and held it - I would love to know the final plan and if there had been more than 100 words, I would have kept reading. Loved how you worked the apple in too. Nicely done.

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    1. Thank you for your lovely comment - I'm really glad that it caught your attention!

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  10. Exciting. Intriguing and a little terrifying. I wonder what happens to David.

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    1. Thank you! All will be revealed - eventually!

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  11. I still remember Ruby Tears. Well done. I enjoy your writing style.

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    1. Thank you for remembering - that seems a while ago now - thank you!

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  12. I love that it's all part of the bigger picture - so clever of you! x

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  13. The final plan sounds interesting

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